how I went on a date once. Something like 8 years in the making. And it was amazing. There was laughter. And tears. Princess crowns and sex chatter. See the thing is. I’d been waiting to meet this chick. For ages. We’d been in contact since before there was a Mega Love. Since before there was Facebook and Twitter, way back before there was MySpace and Fotki, way back in the days of Blackplanet. And so over Christmas break, I went to visit her. Drove hours and hours for a date. And it was amazing. Because afterall, girls do it better.
I thought I might need a pass to her heart. Turns out I just needed one to get onto the base. Are you Hispanic, the desk clerk asked. Like that was somehow relevant. Are you allowed to ask me that, is that even legal? Shit like that doesn’t happen in Canada I said. No I’m not, I told her. And I thought dating was bad, I stood there in judgment, of a country that holds borders like desperation.
But alas, they let me in. McChord Airforce Base. Turns out I’m not quite the criminal/trouble maker I like to think myself. So off we went on our date. Met the kids. Met the hubs. And that’s when it happened. I knew it was meant to be. Real true love shit. Perfect first date magic. Signifying of soul mate connection. She asked if I wanted something to drink. And then offered me a Diet Coke. That she had bought. A whole pack. Extra special. Just for me. In preparation of my arrival. Because she had listened. To all those dates before. All those before. All those “somethings” before. And she knew what I wanted. A crisp. Sparkly. Diet Coke. Weather Girl hit it out of the park. 😉 And then suddenly our date was a threesome. And the hilarity continued. Dinner and cupcakes. Boy chatter and reminiscing. Babies and kidlets. Love. Love. Love. And that’s why girls do it better. Because after I left. I knew. Exactly where I stood with everybody. And they with me. Weather Girl. Jenny Hustle. Together something like awesome. On a girl-date something like a lasting friendship.
And for those on Facebook. Well MY facebook I mean. The best part are the pictures. Me in my princess crown. EVERYBODY doing my signature pose. And then of course the tagline. Wondering if there would be any trouble getting me on the base. Weather Girl asked the hubs. And his answer. I don’t know…I’ve never smuggled a foreigner on post before. Awesome.
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