Kevin Bacon: A Date By Any Other Name (Part Three)

Continued from…Here

So let’s sum up the so called date so far with Kevin Bacon:

1.  He didn’t find Friends funny  (minus)

2.  He’s formally educated (BA)  (plus)

3.  He didn’t always pay on the first date  (minus)

4.  He asked a ton of questions  (plus plus)

5.  His ex was a dating blogger  (minus minus minus)

6.  He had been unclear about this being a date  (minus)

7.  There was a lot of laughter on the date  (plus plus)

8.  And then the thing I haven’t yet told you about.  When sushi was over and the bill came and the lineup of people wanting to fill our seats was out the door.  I guess he didn’t want the date er…whatever…to end yet because he said Let’s go to Starbucks just up the block so I can buy you a coffee.  (plus plus)


The truth is though…regardless of the drawbacks or red flags I was seeing…I was out with a boy.  And I was laughing.  And that my friends, means I was having a good time.  Well.  Until he said something a bit.  Uh.  Off.

Somehow we were talking about clothes.  And how he didn’t so much like when people said he was better looking in a specific outfit.  Because he felt that it was a reflection of some sort of negative aspect of our society…judging people based on their looks rather than personalities.  Though I’ll admit I was a little confused on his argument.  Because it seemed he was saying it was okay to compliment an outfit.  Because that was something a person has a hand in.  But it was not okay to compliment a person’s literal innate appearance.  And that’s when he said something along the lines of your outfit looks really nice.

Now I’m all for recognizing that what is inside a person is what’s important.  But a complete denial of how they present themselves physically?  That seems.  Well.  Unrealistic.  In denial.  Ridiculous.  Because after all, when you love someone and you’re fucking them senseless making love having sex nobody ever says you’re so hilarious or fuck me harder you big kind hearted moralistic stud.  Just sayin’.  And while I get not everybody will think my bunny teeth adorable or see the sparkle blue in my eyes…I wouldn’t want to be with a person who didn’t.  Even if it was my jokes and the way I make a sandwich that brought him to that place.  It doesn’t matter why you think I’m beautiful.  Just as long as you do.  I’m a package deal.  But I need to hear it.

So here’s the thing of the thing though.  What is the difference between meeting a new potential friend and going on a date???  To me…the difference is 2 fold.  Attraction and Intent.  While I had learned throughout the date that he had intent (albeit it in a bit of a pansy-undeclarative-way)…I had no idea about the attraction.  And this whole conversation about the importance of what was inside really wasn’t helping things.  Because if I went off of that alone well shit son, I’d think the whole fucking world loved and wanted to bone me on the regular.  And we all know that’s just not fucking true.  So what’s a girl to think?  Which compartment is a boy supposed to fit in?

Nonetheless the date carried on and somewhere around the 4.5 hour mark it was clear that his friends (who were texting him and he was checking) were harassing him to get his ass over to the poker game he had originally committed to that night (before I’d kidnapped him with this date obviously).  So Kevin Bacon walked me to my car and said something about definitely wanting to hang out with me in the future.  You’ll notice the use of the words hang out rather than say take me out [on a date] or go out with me or go on another date with me.  This kind of ambiguity was not pleasing to my desire to know where I stood…attraction wise…with Kevin Bacon.

And with that we hugged goodbye and went our separate ways.  Uncertain.  Excited.  Who knows.  We’ll see.

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Victoria Young

Writer. Dater. Masturbator. Stop ruining my jokes by believing the self-deprecation. I am far greater than your boner will ever know.